With the longest October of all time dead and gone we now move into November, a month full of turkey, the merciful end of the longest election of my life and actual playoff committee polls. The first poll was released tonight and no surprise it was topped by Alabama, Clemson, Michigan and….wait what? Texas A&M? What is this SEC Bias!? Washington is undefeated! Lamar Jackson by himself is a better team than the Aggies! Stupid committee, clearly they are just fudging the numbers to create intrigue down the stretch. This poll is rigged! This election is rigged! It’s quite possible that I myself am rigged! Everything is rigged.
Load up your muskets, cast your votes and grab your wall building tools folks, this ride isn’t over yet.
The “Win And Your In” Conference
The “Undefeated Power Players” Division
Alabama (8-0)
- USC
- Western Kentucky
- Arkansas
- Texas A&M
Clemson (8-0)
- Auburn
- Troy
- Louisville
- Florida State
Michigan (8-0)
- Colorado
- Penn State
- Wisconsin
Washington (8-0)
- Stanford
- Utah
Washington might be fifth in the first playoff committee rankings but clearly they have an advantage the Aggies do not have and that is being in contention for their conference title. Texas A&M needs to win out and have Alabama drop two SEC games (good luck with that) to have a crack at Atlanta. If Washington wins out the rest of the way they will be an undefeated power five team with a conference title. Even an 11-1 SEC team can’t jump that.
The “Needs Chaos” Conference
The “Win And Your Probably In” Division
Louisville (7-1)
Ohio State (7-1)
Texas A&M (7-1)
These three teams all have justifiable losses and should have interesting Novembers. It is hard to see the undefeated power four running the table so a spot should open if history is any indicator. Texas A&M draws the Mississippis, including Ole Miss whom it historically struggles against, and then finishes at home against a resurgent LSU team. Ohio State will have a shot at redemption against Nebraska and Michigan with their Big Ten title hopes very much alive. Louisville is running out of opportunities but Lamar Jackson should keep the spotlight on the Cardinals as his Heisman campaign pushes into the home stretch.
The “Rooting Against Everyone But Myself and My Country” Division
Auburn (6-2)
LSU (5-2)
Nebraska (7-1)
Penn State (6-2)
Virginia Tech (6-2)
Wisconsin (6-2)
The “We Are Probably Going To Be Shafted” Division
Western Michigan (8-0)
The “Did the Big 12 Just Eliminate Themselves In October?” Division
Baylor (6-1)
Oklahoma (6-2)
West Virginia (6-1)
I damn near put these three in the eliminated conference but I can’t bring myself to do it yet. Everyone has written off the Big 12 as a no-factor even before this weekends upsets. Something doesn’t smell right. West Virginia is better than that loss to Oklahoma State and OU is quietly climbing the ranks. The zombies are running out of time and opportunity but they are still technically alive and that should frighten everyone.
The “Eliminated” Conference
The “Your Best Wasn’t Good Enough” Division
Colorado (6-2)
Houston (7-2)
North Carolina (6-2)
Oklahoma State (6-2)
Troy (6-1)
Tulsa (6-2)
Utah (6-2)
Props to Troy who is a close loss on the road to Clemson away from being an X factor in the playoff race. Also watch out for UNC as a second half power, their November schedule is very winnable and they are a Virginia Tech stumble away from being in the ACC title game.
The “Quality Teams Capable Of Knocking Anyone Out On A Given Day” Division
Arkansas (5-3)
Iowa (5-3)
Minnesota (6-2)
Northwestern (4-4)
USC (5-3)
Washington State (6-2)
The “Cannibalization of the Mountain West Continues” Division
Boise State (7-1)
San Diego State (7-1)
Wyoming (6-2)
The “Let’s See What Your Made Of” Division
Florida (6-1)
Pittsburgh (5-3)
The “Above Average, Average Teams” Division
Ohio (6-3)
South Florida (7-2)
Stanford (5-3)
Temple (6-3)
Toledo (6-2)
Wake Forest (5-3)
The “Streaky As All Hell And What The F Is Up With FSU’s O-Line?!” Division
Arizona State (5-4)
Army (5-3)
California (4-4)
Florida State (5-3)
Indiana (4-4)
Kansas State (5-3)
Kentucky (5-3)
Maryland (5-3)
The “A Handful Of Points Away From A Successful Season” Division
BYU (4-4)
Miami (4-4)
The “Snakebit” Division
Georgia Tech (5-3).
Tennessee (5-3)
UCLA (3-5)
The “SEC East And Big 12 Texas Teams Clusterfuck Of Mediocrity” Division
Georgia (4-4)
Ole Miss (3-5)
South Carolina (4-4)
TCU (4-4)
Texas (4-4)
Texas Tech (4-4)
Vanderbilt (4-4)
The “G5 Teams With Winning Records That Can Play With Anyone But Probably Can’t Beat The Big Boys” Division
Appalachian State (6-2)
Louisiana Tech (6-3)
Middle Tennessee (6-2)
New Mexico (5-3)
Western Kentucky (6-2)
The “Meh” Division
Air Force (5-3)
Akron (5-4)
Central Michigan (5-4)
Colorado State (4-4)
Eastern Michigan (5-4)
Memphis (5-3)
SMU (4-4)
Southern Miss (5-3)
Syracuse (4-4)
UCF (4-4)
UTSA (4-4)
The “Below Average, Alright Teams” Division
Boston College (4-4)
Cincinnati (4-4)
Hawaii (4-5)
North Carolina State (4-4)
The “Not As Bad As Everyone Thinks But Still Definitely Bad” Division
Ball State (4-4)
Duke (3-5)
Mississippi State (3-5)
North Texas (4-4)
Notre Dame (3-5)
Old Dominion (5-3)
Oregon (3-5)
South Alabama (4-4)
Tulane (3-5)
Virginia (2-6)
The “Praying For A Bowl Game Miracle” Division
ECU (3-5)
Georgia Southern (4-4)
Idaho (4-4)
Miami (OH) (3-6)
Purdue (3-5)
UConn (3-6)
Utah State (3-5)
The “Hot Garbage” Division
Arizona (2-6)
Arkansas State (3-4)
Kent State (3-6)
Louisiana-Lafayette (3-4)
Michigan State (2-6)
Missouri (2-6)
Nevada (3-5)
Oregon State (2-5)
UNLV (3-6)
The “Players Only Meeting Teams In Crisis Hot Garbage” Division
Buffalo (2-6)
Charlotte (3-5)
FIU (3-6)
Georgia State (2-6)
Illinois (2-6)
Louisiana Monroe (2-6)
Marshall (2-6)
New Mexico State (2-6)
Northern Illinois (2-6)
Rutgers (2-6)
Texas State (2-5)
UTEP (2-6)
The “Not Just Eliminated But You Know Your Not Even Going Bowling In October” Conference
The “Not As Bad As The Division Below But Still Pretty Damn” Division
Iowa State (1-7)
Massachusetts (2-7)
The “Tim DeRuyter Memorial Sputtering Dumpster Fire” Division
Bowling Green (1-7)
FAU (1-7)
Fresno State (1-8)
Kansas (1-7)
Rice (1-7)